the moment of question

i'm feeling resigned to it at this point.
i burrow down, pull the sheets to my chin, roll onto my left side, and it passes through me like a shiver. all day, i've been going about this purpose. it was a great day--because of this purpose. i've built everything on this assumption.
what if it's not real?
and then it is passed and i pray a little, then drift out.

every night.