the way things go

i once asked o'byrne to describe himself as he was then.

"numb," he said. "wasn't scared, wasn't happy, just f*%!@$# numb. kept to myself, did what i had to do. it was a very weird detached feeling those first few months."

"you weren't scared?"

"no, i was too numb. i never let my brain go there. there were boundaries in my brain and i just never let myself go to that spot."

--sebastian junger, war

this paragraph grabbed me today, on the metrobus coming home from work somewhere on connecticut avenue. i'm reading along about these men experiencing the horrors of blood and splatter and crush of war. but all of the sudden i’m looking at words that described things about me, too. in a book called "war."

maybe it needs no explanation. i cannot elaborate or improve upon his words. they are perfect in their simplicity, stripped bare and lacking over-processing, just the way we are, cocooned in for protection.